Femeia castratoare
Today I will address another new topic, perhaps revolting, but necessary. If you have read the articles written by me, you understand that this kind of approach to information is my specialty.
So, let’s proceed!
The woman of out times is the result of a long process of transformation both at the personal level and at the level of society and humanity.
If we study the history of the evolution for the status of women over time, we can see that, only in the Neolithic period, women played a main place in society, matriarchy being linked to the cult of fecundity and fertility, following a considerably long period, in which the woman was placed in a place of subordination and excessive dependence on men. There were also exceptions to the rule, but most women were considered appendages of men, bearers of children and responsible for the house.
Starting with the 1800s, the first emancipated women appear, who assume the male roles of society, want to study, who hope for equality of education and rights between women and men.
At the beginning of the 1900s, Sigmund Freud appeared on the scene, who spoke freely about women’s sexuality and orgasms, and later, the sexual revolution of 1960 which triggered an extraordinary process of transformation of women, of her emancipation from several points of view, in especially the sexual one, by assuming sexual pleasure.
All this female freedom was perceived as a threat, even a blow below the belt, to men’s masculinity.
I know you are asking where I want to go with this introduction (to be in tune with the subject, all this intellectual prelude), but please be patient.
Thus, the woman discovered her potential power, became independent from many points of view, makes the house alone, raises her children alone, even sexually self-satisfies (attention! I do not condemn this sexual behavior, I attribute a professional role to this subject , I’m talking about a reality). She developed many masculine characteristics of her being (the so-called animus described by Carl Gustav Jung), sometimes to the detriment of her specific femininity.
Nowadays, it is normal for women to be in positions of leadership, decision-making, financial, emotional, mental and even sexual independence, often with castrating attitudes and behaviors towards men.
From the specific extreme of the 1400s, we reach the other extreme, that of a manly, aggressive woman, at the exchange between the feminine and the masculine role.
Balance occurs when the woman has the ability to selectively use both natural aspects of her being, those of anima and animus, being feminine and loving at the same time.
In the article I wrote called „Standards, values and limits of a relationship”, I talk about the fact that a man, once upon a time, told me that we women are the ones who „spoil” men or on the contrary, we help them grow, depending of what we offer and allow, both when they are children by the way we raise them but also when they are adult men in a relationship with us as a lover/husband.
It was amazing for me to hear this, but with time I understood that there is a great truth in this statement.
Well, this is where my introduction ends, I chose to argue like this, to bring an overview of how the castrating behaviors and attitudes of many women today have developed.
So, I’ll get directly into the subject, by describing clear examples of castrating behaviors and attitudes towards the boys and men in our lives:
1. If you are a boy’s mother and you do things in his place, out of the desire to help him, to make his life easier, then you castrate the formation of your boy’s masculinity;
2. If you often say „You can’t do this, leave me!”, without giving your boy a chance to try, as he can, even if he makes mistakes, then you have every chance of raising a eunuch, emotionally immature and miss your boy’s chance at masculinity;
3. If you are hyperprotective with your boy, you raise him in a golden cage, you give him everything on a tray, like a prince, if you have a symbiotic relationship with him, then reread point 2. because it suits you. You are doing a great disservice to the future women in your boy’s life;
4. If you are the woman who is the boss in the house, the one who „cuts and hangs”, you are the one who decides, and the man only brings the money, then you call yourself a castrating woman and thus you cannot complain about the weight on your shoulders.
You play this role, you like to be validated by the enormous, over-responsible work you do. Why are you in such a relationship? And don’t tell me the excuse about the children that it’s not good, stay because you like the role of power you have.
I know it is very difficult to give up this extraordinary power, but be careful that there are also adverse reactions to its consumption, over long periods of time;
5. If you go to a restaurant with your boyfriend/husband and you call the waiter for the order and the bill, then you have the capacity of a castrating woman;
6. If you have a meeting with a man, and you choose the restaurant, choose the seats, the time, the means of transport, call him to remind him what to do, ask him if he is ready and scold him if he is late, then you have the ability of a woman castrates.
If the man you’re dating accepts all of this, out of fear of rejection/loneliness, then you have a future eunuch in front of you, if he isn’t already.
7. If you are nagging, criticizing, playing the role of the victim, if you constantly criticize, then you have the capacity of a castrating woman. Nagging and criticism are two perfect tools for castration. You don’t know if you are nagging and critical? No problem! Ask your husband and children. You might not like the answer;
8. If you criticize your husband or children in public (see that this category also includes family/friends), denigrating them, then you have the capacity of a castrating woman. I know castrating women who make so-called „public jokes” related to their husband’s impotence/sexual underperformance;
9. If you use public moments, in which you show that you can do some things, that you are strong, smart and your husband is not, then you have the ability of a castrating woman. There is no competition between you and the man in your life, you are complementary in the roles of woman-man;
10. If you like to make the woman difficult to conquer/approachable, the tough woman, the „hard-to-get” woman, if you consider the fact that the man has to fight hard until he reaches you or conquers you, then you have the mentality of a woman castrates.
The balanced woman, with self-confidence, knows how much and when to offer in the relationship with the men in her life, without guilt, remorse or other negative feelings;
11. If you put yourself in a position of superiority and insult men (example: all men are pigs, womanizers, brats, you can’t rely on them), then you have the ability of a castrating woman. I wonder what kind of woman brought them to their current state. :)))
12. If you like to manipulate the men around you, to satisfy your desires, pleasures and needs, then you have the ability of a castrating woman;
13. If you like to bully the man, to behave like a hyperprotective mother, who tells him everything to do, then you have the ability of a castrating woman;
Well, now that you know all this, castrate woman, you can no longer complain about the masochistic men in your life, about the fact that you can’t find real men, with testicles, to polarize the femininity in you.
Daniela-Monica Guzu
Expert psiholog/psihoterapeut/trainer cu experiență de peste 13 ani în multiple arii ale psihologiei copiilor, adolescenților și adulților.
Contact:
Telefon – 0770 244 914
E-mail – contact@danielaguzu.ro
expertpsiholog@yahoo.com
